What happened?

Incredible show last night. Too good to put into words. Jack White is God. That much we know for sure. For clarity on today's post please refer to rule #4 on your right. That should explain things. And for more ass-tastic pics please click here.

Mental Kegels

Apologies in advance if Apples and Moustaches is bit scattered, distracted and overly sweaty this week. There is a perfect storm brewing that could very well lead to our demise. Two events this week in particular are looming;

Wednesday: The Raconteurs at Bimbo’s

Saturday: The NFL draft

We’re anticipating spontaneous combustion or possibly a gentle simmer, to a boil to a full blown explosion. So bear with us. Please. So for today, while we go through our mental kegels in prepartion for the week’s events…here are some links to check out:


*For our female readers, check out these bad ass shoes Gwyneth Paltrow is wearing. You know I’m not into shoe fetishes but these pics lead me to rethink my positioning.


*Radiohead is on Late Night with Conan O’Brien this Wednesday. They’re performing live from London and telecasting the performance in order to reduce their carbon footprint. Is there anything they can’t do? Damn it they're cool. Also, they have an upcoming hour long show on the Music HD channel sometime in May. We'll find the date/time for you...stay tuned.


*Kanye West and his fiancé who nobody really cares about have broken up. I guess we have to go with the obvious joke here..“She takes my money…”


*An interview with Tina Fey and Amy Poheller discussing their new upcoming movie, Baby Mama. If I’ve said it once I’ve said it 1,000 times. These bitches are funny. I hope Kristen Wiig makes an appearance.


*Over/Under on Myley Cyrus turning into the next Britney Spears? Two years, 3 months, 12 days. That's my guess. Check these pics out and then place your bets.


*This video always leaves me satisfied.

Home, Sick

Things that sound like fun to do when you’re home sick from work, but actually kinda suck…

*Watch morning shows on TV?…um, has anyone seen those lately? Regis and Kelly can blow me. The View? Yeah, if I’m menstruating. Price is Right? I’m not sure if this show still exists.

*Jerk off?…no energy. Too tired.

*Nap?…too many meds in the system won’t allow actual sleep

*Read?…not possible, head is too fuzzy which means words are too fuzzy which means my head gets fuzzy again

*Talk on the phone?…to whom? Everyone is working. At least my wife doesn’t have caller ID at her desk so I can keep bugging her.

*Check Email?…why would I do that when I’m away from work? That’s just crazy talk.

*Play with Patch?...That’s fun for like 10 minutes, but then he gets pissed I’m not just letting him sleep all day. I don’t blame him. Little bastard.

*Watch a movie…too much commitment. I tried to watch Just Friends with Ryan Reynolds but gave up about 3 minutes in. But damn it he’s handsome.

*Listen to the new Raconteurs album?...I felt too shitty to even do that. And if you know how much I love Jack White then you know how crappy I felt.

Underrated Part About Getting Tickets to See The Raconteurs at Bimbo's

You know what's underrated about getting tickets to see The Raconteurs at Bimbo's?

Nothing. Absolutely fucking nothing. This is so properly rated I just busted in my pants.

Thanks,
Jericho